The CRAFT Guide to How to Get Your Face Printed on Money

For those of us whose goal in life is to get some country to print a new banknote or to mint a new coin with their picture on it, it's not always easy since most people who are on banknotes and coins are dead. And what's the point of getting your face on money if you're not around to enjoy going to a shop and paying for your groceries with a picture of yourself. So, here are a few ways to achieving this dream WITHOUT having to die first:
1- Become the Queen of England. She's on quite a bit of money.
2- Be the first to climb Mount Everest. We can see how that might be difficult, but you can always try.
3- Invent a time-machine. Not only will this help you get enough recognition to be printed on money, but it can also help you achieve the first two ways.
4- Become an animal. Many countries have pictures of animals on their bills. Be careful though, not all animals are as respected or revered by enough people to get printed on banknotes. One suggestion is to choose an extinct or endangered species.
5- Become a flag. But make sure you're in one of those countries that print their flag on their banknotes.
6- Become a digit. Zero is preferable as it appears quite often.

So there... That's plenty of options. Now you don't have an excuse to just sit around and feel sorry for yourself that no one's ever gonna buy stuff with pictures of you.

A Crash Course in Object-Orient Programming

I can't think of a better way to start a Friday.

Quote of the day

Khaled: It is a picture of a dead mouse BUT It is a NICE picture of a dead mouse!

Fabrice's first experiment

So maybe he's not very subtle when he observes his subjects... But it's understandable to see such excitement when conducting his first experiment.

What works for you: Messy or Tidy?

When changing desks, whom does it take longer to move, the messy guy or the tidy guy?

It didn't take the great minds of CRAFT a lot of time to figure it out... But the answer is a simple 3-dimensional function with the following dimensions:
1. Physical strength
2. Mental prowess
3. Tidiness, messiness

It's quite simple really. On the physical strength dimensions, the more of it you have, the more messy you can afford to be and the less tidy you need to be: For someone with high physical strength, moving can be as simple as picking up your initial desk and shaking it over you destination desk so that all its contents fall "in place", which for a messy guy is basically anywhere on the desk. On the other hand, if you're completely week, you will need to move stuff with one item at a time regardless of how little you care how they're sorted.

On the Mental prowess dimension, the smarter you are, the quicker you can make decisions about how best to sort your things to gain optimal performance out of them in the future. As a result, those gifted with high IQs, might find it worth it to spend the extra microseconds on planning how things should be. Stupid people on the other hand would have to expend an inconceivable amount of effort just to figure out if a particular book would fit in a drawer or not.

To make things easier for everyone, we added this handy chart that shows what you should be (messy or tidy) based on how smart and strong you are.

Who am I?

I am Kebab!

Random flicks of the day

Same old life at CRAFT. After a couple of hours trying to compile 'spaghetti' code, I felt that some pictures should have been taken. Nicolas was compulsively removing his staff from the office preparing for 'the move'. He decided that was not the case to clean the drawers of his desk as it would have taken him a couple of hours. Finally Fabrice recycled some of Nicolas's crap.

Enjoy!

Mirweis second life

Mirweis is a reseacher the day, and has a second life the night. Well he is not a chipendale like this famous cop, but he's DJ. (Dj moustafa lampion ?)

It's not unusual that some tunes get stucked in Mirweis mind for weeks. Moustafa then make us share his spirit of joy by turning on the speaker of its PC at the end of the day and play his favorite melodies.

Here is an example of what we use to suffer at the end of the day :
http://goldfarmer.ytmnd.com/


Now he's heading on "Fuck you I won't do what they told ya!"

How far the rabbit hole goes

I found this message in my inbox this morning. I found it extremely appropriate for the collector. :-)

Lightening buddies

So you know how people think that if something very lucky happens to them during the course of a day, it means that they're having a lucky day and hence should go to the casino or buy a lottery ticket or something.

Obviously this doesn't work and the reason it doesn't work is simple: if you've already been lucky during the day, then you're not likely to get even more lucky and win the lottery. That would be too much luck for one person in one day. On the other hand, if you are extremely unlucky during the day, like say when you're struck by lightening, then buying a lottery ticket would most likely lead to a win since the resulting luck would balance out the unlucky lightening strike.

The problem is though that it's hard to buy a lottery ticket when you're struck by lightening.

Enter the lightening buddy! The lightening buddy is someone with whom you make a pact that if either of you gets struck by lightening, the other will run and buy a lottery ticket with the lightening victim's name on it, ensuring a well-deserved lottery win for the hospital-bound buddy. Both buddies share the prize and everyone is happy.

Following the same logic, you can declare yourself (preferably secretly) as someone else's lottery buddy. Your job is to monitor the weather and as soon as you find that your victim is in an area with thunderstorms, you buy a lottery ticket with that victims name so that if they win, they will probably also be struck by lightening.

Contributers to this Craft Piece of Bullshit: Florence, Fabrice, Khaled